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Valiurrahaman

of

Varanasi, Utter Prades, India

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My Final Dress

by

Valiurrahaman

Life -- an undefeatable event
made by me, a fatigue creature
like an insect creeping here & there
having no shelter, no destination, no mentor.
I got what I wished
I wished for no satisfaction
like a stranger in an Island
wishes to built a cabin in the air.
Love, friendship and relations
are nothing but like formal trousers;
are dresses for show and pomp
and at last_ night-white gown.
Death must be remembered
must_ must_ must_ must_
for becoming a human race
good in the eyes of God—the commander of death.


If You Are Not

by

Valiurrahaman

Everything is but chaos
If you are not, If you are not

I can achieve I want
I can leave I want
I can climb or fall
I can think what I want
I can do this or that
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ !
But everything is but chaos,
If you are not,
if you are not.
When I lost or gained
When I part or retained
When I feel alone, weak or strong
Only you do come, only you do come
With none but you alone
And lift to me to see you_
crucified yet everlasting alive.
Everything is but chaos
If you are not, If you are not

Untitled

by

Valiurrahaman

"Life is a walking shadow" said Shakespeare
But here even shadow is dead.
Remains nothing
but ashes of one's actions
Even that is not!
Who cares about hell or hevean
Neither life, nor shadow,nor walking of a flesh.
Yet

Life is.

Untitled

by

Valiurrahaman

"Life is a walking shadow" said Shakespeare
But here even shadow is dead.
Remains nothing
but ashes of one's actions
Even that is not!
Who cares about hell or hevean
Neither life, nor shadow,nor walking of a flesh.
Yet

Life is.

suicide

by

Valiurrahaman

I am alone
to commit suicide
closed in a dead closet
free but wingless
open sky but hellish chaos
like an infinite dark world
I am closed.

I am alone
to cry and wry
in masque,in temple,in church,
where is Protector
They say " here"
I found nowhere
I am insecure

I am alone
to run and turn
my cloth is dust and dirt
not cleaned flesh
yet they say to pray
to clean cloth and wash hands and palm
everything is meaningless.

I am alone
to ask your Protection
protect me.
O! Teacher

A few lines

by

Valiurrahaman

Depth of Verse
Depth of verse can do
what a monk fails to do.

It changes our selves utterly
our heart, our art for seeing ugliest
as a beautiful gift of Father.

Money, place, regard, designation
are injected in the blood of ambivalent faiths
have made our batial ration.

Father, mother, sisters, brothers
are nothing but tools, stair and table
drugs and booze are remainders.

reason, logic, Books, great letters
are means for disputations, distinctions,
all are alone gods all are creators.

Yet everyone is dissatisfied,dislocated,dissociated
alone sufferer from his questions
which are unanswerable...if
answerable , impracticable...

Realities...all are horrifying
Let us return to Depth of Verse
Commandments of our Fathers
Commandments of our Father.

Depth of verse can do
what a monk fails to do.

I AM

by

Valiurrahaman


How can I deny my self
who alone stands against
Satan--distractor of Faith;
who alone lifts me
when I loses all I have
when no one comes to help
my self is there, my self.

Clouds are dark and dump
I play in the mud and mump
yet pleasure comes to me
as silent,sullen sleep come over the poor.

As a child talk at night to elf,
I talk to my self.

As I Heard

by

Valiurrahaman

"He has imported cars, impressive relations
has so many ways of recreations,
has so many kothies, houses and closets
has loving girls and whirls at sixties,
has acres of land,
a landlard in the city,man of industries
the chairman sahab,
the big boss sahab
but can you say me
how much he added this year to my sallery,"
asked the chaukidar.
"Not even a single paisa."
I said.
Therefore I call him a begger
a big begger
having all for none, for nothing gut exploiting labour.
He is a man of no lession."

He realised whispering,
'No body can be a god,exept
God is Giver,bigger,calm,balm,lifter,gifter.
Praise Him.
He is the Director of directors.
Praise Him'

You

by

Valiurrahaman

What should I say of your graces and gifts
Language fails me to praise You.
What should I ask for?
Nothing is nor can be concealed from You.
No desire remains after Your Love.
Truly, nor even love itself, nor anything else except You.
What can I devote in the name of You?
Not my heart, nor words, nor lips are mine.
No flower, no flesh, no breath, no thing belongs to me,
But my devotion to You alone, my love to You.
O love to Love of You! I salute You.
Forget me not.

Melodious Moment

by

Valiurrahaman

A strange smile on chicks
occured onto me
when that melodious moment
reminds me, resides onto me.

A receded voice from an invisible world
I hear, I hear presence of an unheard one
when that melodious moment
reminds me,resides onto me.

Bless Me to Be Forbearing

by

Valiurrahaman

A creature, art, image of the Unknown,
is incomprehensible, unknown to all his groan and shown,
follows great instructors of faith,
without faith;

A bone of dust and lust,
attempts to show place of great and must,
a bone with skin under skin of blood,
without blood;

A mask without face,
an idle without grace,
breathing without living pace,
marked, remarked without eternal trace;

Yet that Unknown One has great kind,
never forgets His image, art, creation
never do unjust,
hands and lifts
without all withs and withouts.

Great Artist!
Bless me to be forbearing!

gods without common good

by

Valiurrahaman

I remember my father's suggestions
but I do not execute.
After a lot loss,under cynical rage
I see myself in the broken glass
and found it without image.

Where I am. Who I am.
absurd question.
remains nothing
but repentance and obligation.
let us strove for salvation.
let us go to homes of god.
let us worship gods without common good.

Saqi

by

Valiurrahaman

Let this mystery be demystified.
It is demystified now that
You are man, You are God

You are the world and dwellers
You are the scene and seer and seeing
You are the idle and you are worshipper
You are the veil, and air like open sky
You are idol, you are worshipper
You wait, and thing to be waited
Yourself is limitless, yourself is created by your Selves
You are the unknown, you are known
You are restless, you are comfort.
You are world and people who are alive.
You are love, lover and beloved
You are wine, wined and place of drunkards.
You is you I is you and you is me.
All is One.
Let this mystery be demystified.
Let this black veil be unveiled
It is demystified now that
You are man, You are God

Let Me Be Dust But You Be with Me

by

Valiurrahaman

I am alone but I feel world within
when I feel you, whenever I reel and realize you.
May be I am crazy, absurd, and waste;
may be I am for no use to You and Your people;
may be I am a sin, lost, wayless, aimless;
may be I am creeping like a warm for food;
without appetite, grace, expelled from paradise;
may be I am a victim of original sin;
may be I am whatever, wherever, whoever.
I do not know anything about me;
except a faithful but week devotee to you;
without knowing what you like or dislike;
what you bless or condemn; what you know or what not;
O World! Take everything away from me
Make rich yourself, leave me with me.
Nothing belongs to me, everything is your
Except you I am nothing
Let me be dust but be with me.
The rest remains no more.
Let me be nothing but be with me.
The rest remains no more.
Let me be without let, lettings, being, beings.
Let me not be more lets, lots.
Father! O my peer!
In the name of prophets, and friends to you
Let yourself be mine.
The rest remains no more.
This I know.

Make Me Fearless

by

Valiurrahaman

Drive my fear out, O Saqi
Your fear is enough.

Why to fear world- a fearful heaven;
why to fear others but you;
why to fear desires, instincts, death or sins;
why to fear others but you.
I remember Your Highness said:
"I make my friends alone, poor, veiled, but not disheartened;
"helpless but not fearful; poor but not unkind"

O saqi! Make me drunk, make me fearless.
Make me not dead like others who
live, look, and like knowingly that
You never made them for.

Those who are fearless to you
are great in fear to them and their world.

O Saqi! Save me, make me drunk
Save me, O Saqi! O Savior!

"

Let Me Be Dust But You Be with Me

by

Valiurrahaman

I am alone but I feel world within
when I feel you, whenever I reel and realize you.
May be I am crazy, absurd, and waste;
may be I am for no use to You and Your people;
may be I am a sin, lost, wayless, aimless;
may be I am creeping like a warm for food;
without appetite, grace, expelled from paradise;
may be I am a victim of original sin;
may be I am whatever, wherever, whoever.
I do not know anything about me;
except a faithful but week devotee to you;
without knowing what you like or dislike;
what you bless or condemn; what you know or what not;
O World! Take everything away from me
Make rich yourself, leave me with me.
Nothing belongs to me, everything is your
Except you I am nothing
Let me be dust but be with me.
The rest remains no more.
Let me be nothing but be with me.
The rest remains no more.
Let me be without let, lettings, being, beings.
Let me not be more lets, lots.
Father! O my peer!
In the name of prophets, and friends to you
Let yourself be mine.
The rest remains no more.
This I know.

Make Me Fearless

by

Valiurrahaman

Drive my fear out, O Saqi
Your fear is enough.

Why to fear world- a fearful heaven;
why to fear others but you;
why to fear desires, instincts, death or sins;
why to fear others but you.
I remember Your Highness said:
"I make my friends alone, poor, veiled, but not disheartened;
"helpless but not fearful; poor but not unkind"

O saqi! Make me drunk, make me fearless.
Make me not dead like others who
live, look, and like knowingly that
You never made them for.

Those who are fearless to you
are great in fear to them and their world.

O Saqi! Save me, make me drunk
Save me, O Saqi! O Savior!

Confusion

by

Valiurrahaman

This is mine,that is mine
this and that and all is mine
but
Do they belong to me?
No.Never.Not at all.
What do I want is not known
what pleasure I am in pursuit

Can this world satisfy me?
What permanent pleasure is
that I need.

Hatred Love

by

Valiurrahaman

All went in vein
except complaints and repentence
except words of curse and spiritual stain
when sapless love dispersed.

All remains nothing
but paronoid and parlytic frenziness
and cancerous heart
when somebody says " I hate you,"
living and loving some years.

Hatred!

Being A Muslim

by

Valiurrahaman

I felt never Islam
as religion-muslim's religion
nor felt muslim a noun in islamic grammar
but today I am remembered and recited
what I am--a muslim when one said,
"r u muslim? sorry, here room on rent for muslim
is not available" shocked and asked "r u not muslim"
"No! a Hindu" He said
"Hindu? u r also a muslim" I said,
"believer in One"
"Don't you believe on God"
"Yes , I believe but I'm not muslim"
"muslim-a man of faith and devotion
"are you not such a man?
"Yes"
"Don't you know those Books that came for our peace
and fraternity?
Books--Great Instructors of fraternity
and peace under the command of One Supreme"
"Don't you believe"
"yes"
You are muslim--a bhakt
a lover of enlightened faith.
But i'm not a muslim though my name is
vali--an urdu word...
Because I have loose faith
a utilitarian faith, a damaged faith...
I'm not a muslim
Excuse me!

Is Not

by

Valiurrahaman

Isolation is all
I'm not alone
but thronged with
numberless abstractions
creeping,rolling images
of nightmarish rages
of wages
I got from acts I did.

Is Not

by

Valiurrahaman

Isolation is all
I'm not alone
but thronged with
numberless abstractions
creeping,rolling images
of nightmarish rages
of wages
I got from acts I did.

Interview

by

Valiurrahaman

Dimensions,perspectives,philosophy
of what I had heard about knowledge
went into chaotic market where
value was not equal to things!
Dead experts asked questions: value
of knowledge I had and salary for my certificates.
Interview rested on bargain
bargain in the name of quality education

I wept
saraswti wept
I left
saraswti left
I slept on the road
saraswti slept
saraswti wept
and wept a lot...!

Gap

by

Valiurrahaman

In between two
and in all betweens
and in all to all
One remains
as never changing fellow
such is a my Friend
always lifts when
I fall or trembles to fall
down to the illusionary flour:
a death land he makes to me green
sands seems a promised land of
something I feel but
words are not for.

Temple

by

Valiurrahaman

An idolless idol
is within
without breath, and desire
without all ifs and buts
lives standing and sitting
with blessings spreading
over the temple.
Greenish on the sands.
O! Merciful!

Temple

by

Valiurrahaman

An idolless idol
is within
without breath, and desire
without all ifs and buts
lives standing and sitting
with blessings spreading
over the temple.
Greenish on the sands.
O! Merciful!

Consciousness

by

Valiurrahaman

Poor mind,
dead heart,
squeezed consciousness,
yet bones are ready
to cry " I am living"

Energy that I lost
in black world of my condemned
desires without control
with stained soul
to find what I am suffering
from.

I feel hell in
paradise I called once.

Now, I am no more
though "I am living"

Instinct

by

Valiurrahaman

A sudden explosion
of unexpected emotion
yields the prime cause
of life in the hell.

We know the result,
we do for the same.

How damnable our
instinct is!

A sudden exhaustion.
A sudden death in life.

Be near and
take us away
from Your
condemners.

O Commander!
lead not
but take this palm
in Your Palms.

Do You Love Me

by

Valiurrahaman

Her proposal of marriage
without emotional touch of words
without any touch of interest
I accepted though
I know her curiosity
of pockets and social rackets
I have I live.

Money minded emotion
Rubbish.

Prime Causes of My Being in the World

by

Valiurrahaman

I can't forget dust & clay; potter and frame
which gave me a shape, slate, plate , and gate
you had been a cause of one of them, though
I was neither of them,
Now, I, One of them.

It is a gift:
Prime Causes of My Being in the World.
My Teacher!
Its all and all yours.
Nothing is mine.

Prime Causes of My Being in the World

by

Valiurrahaman

I can't forget dust & clay; potter and frame
which gave me a shape, slate, plate , and gate
you had been a cause of one of them, though
I was neither of them,
Now, I, One of them.

It is a gift:
Prime Causes of My Being in the World.
My Teacher!
Its all and all yours.
Nothing is mine.

Voice of a Calm Heart

by

Valiurrahaman

Love is my hobby-part
hate is your right
you fight,they fight
peace be upon you all.

Let me remain true to me,
quite and white under His sight.

When dissatisfied self stares anger
at my heart remember how our Hussain
had made avail water in the desert for his
distractors-- disastrous men, though
he knew they would be killer to him.

My heart becomes humble,and forgiving.

When I go to make a curse against anyone
my heart's silence sheds and reminds me
how someone nearest & dearest to God
crucified while he said:
"God forgive them,they do not know
what they are doing..."

Love is my hobby-part
hate is your right
you fight,they fight
peace be upon you all.

Thus I Invoke You

by

Valiurrahaman

Why do you not come near to me?
O ! my heart, O! my eternal part.
Why do you not come near to me?

I shy to admit my fault
Though I know You know even hidden spot
I am ready to lift scattered salt
with my eyelids if you ask
I am ready to creep like a worm
with my abdomen and arm if you ask
I am ready to see me burnt pyreless corps
in the fire of zahannum
I cannot beg for Paradise, for nothing
but You be with, near to me...
Then all hells are the one Heaven.

Why do you not come near to me?
O ! my heart, O! my eternal part.
Why do you not come near to me?

Har Ki Kheri

by

Valiurrahaman

Celestial morning!
Har ki Kheri
Voice of Pious Flow of Water
People dipped in.

Har Ki Kheri--Haridwar
thought to be a place of the Ganga
reached to have a dip for sanctity of soul.

Never imagined what I saw
diggers of the pious river
Ganga-digers
hoping to find some jewels and coins
ancients and modern coins.

Never imagined I saw
broken images of qudsi idols
broken and spoiled images of gods
they worship as devotee once
but the same under their feet
rushing in and out of the River
dipping in with not any greet
rushing without being known of
head, chest, waist, eye, nose and feet of
Kali, Durga, Bhole, Saraswati, Ganesh
Couple idols: Krishna-Radhe, Shankar-Parwati.

Ah! gods without laurels
deceased gods, deceased people
dipping to find out peace
resurrection and sin-release
digging to find out coins
for food and wines--morsels
The demand of the poor
Digging and dipping for but
Ruins, ruins, ruins.

Ceased with some ceaseless unwanted signs,
yet gods put afflicted adams
as their real successors.