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Ka Trena Underdue

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Greensboro, NC, US

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he said

by

Ka Trena Underdue

you are so beautiful he said
why
did i
sound
so
sad
just cause
i
dont
get
it
just cause
i dont
see what
they see
why do
i
constantly....
constantly...
hold in rivers of pain....
why cant my feelings flow
flow
flow
like i know they should...
if i released them from the dungeon
deep within my heart
why cant i just love
be loved
be
and have
what i so desperately need
but do not open my arms to
take
in
so
it...so often...
slips
slides
runs
through...and is lost
and
i wonder
why
i
just
cant...
you are so beautiful he said


Back for the First

by

Ka Trena Underdue

i hadn't been there for awhile.
i've visited
yes.
but never stayed.
Maybe...
for fear of drowning
of being immoble
not knowing how.
so instead i stood
Right.on.the.edge.
until someone slow-ly
pushedmein...
...
...
and i didn't drown
but at first i was scared
my heart beat rapidly
my face a shield
You didn't need to see
those emotions
flowing
deep
inside of me...
and then I swam
but slowly
taking My time
testing the waters
relishing in the coolness
of the warmness
that enveloped Me.
to some.
not much.
it was just a swim.
but i was drenched
in My own
happiness...
for once
in a long
while.
and I needed to stay
and never go away.
'cause
I am
for seriously
lovin'
this...
wave.

A little thing

by

Ka Trena Underdue

That little thing
that occupies your life
Is an enemy of mine
Never cared for it much
but now...
It's every movement
catches the edge of my mind.
It does not make me angry
and it does not seperate
the me
from the you
But now...
I just wish that
that little thing
had never come to be
'cause in my mind
it's a Big Thing
that migh take you...
from me...

Words and Things

by

Ka Trena Underdue

locked.
tight.
quiet.
mad. no. angry. no.
sad. no. yes.
no reason.
every reason.
name a reason.
5 minutes.
5 days.
5 weeks.
5 years.
can’t tell
off. and.
on. and.
off. and
swinging
from one
to another across
that stream
unexplained
by
me.

Beauty and the Beast

by

Ka Trena Underdue

The Beauty is unwillingly
placed on her pedestal
By the image of
a Beast
His awkward feelings he attempts
to mask,
but his soul is weakening
and growing anew
into something that does
not mirror his image.
and in the Beauties vision
the borders of hearts are blurred
and there are no boundaries
or any distinction
between
this beauty and this beast
they are equally
bound
by their fates
and could not hope to escape
but by turning their hearts
from warm.
To be on solid ground with
a woman and a man
with everything
inside and out
showing
every
single
little thing
and still choosing to
love.
and accept.
themselves.
each other.
and everything
for beauties could be beasts
and beasts could be beauties
at times
and they know
this...
that
no hay rosas sin espenas...

Together...

by

Ka Trena Underdue

A rose,
lovingly planted far from
harsh soil
and sheltered from the burning rains
That rose,
never expecting
a wind as strong
as to uproot it from

it’s place
from what it had always known
to a far away land
where nothing grows...
until...
by luck...
another flower begins to bloom...

Short

by

Ka Trena Underdue

Wanting to be
everything
and yet always feeling
as if
I’ve missed my mark.
trying to shed these
insecurities
and striving to
learn what’s in those eyes.
Needing to be taught
but cautious of
how to act.
continuously thinking
always thinking
of how
and why
of what
to do
and always
falling
short.

Something New

by

Ka Trena Underdue

The warned me about chasing after leprechauns...
they thought they could keep me away
but after being kept from everything
for so long
I needed to see something new.

They couldn’t and wouldn’t
They chose not to understand
my longing for this
something new.

My fearful exterior has long ago been shed
and I was ready and well prepared
for whatever was to come next
when I met this something new.

So this is why I’m walking this path
unremembered by all except for those
whose old treasured memories
will soon be something new

to me.

Press Play

by

Ka Trena Underdue

Have you ever just wanted to rewind
and reestablish to your juvenile self
that they shouldn’t, couldn’t, wouldn’t
do that
that they should, could, and would
do this
as to help your future self from having to replay
those ifs and maybes in your adult mind?

Have you ever wanted to fast forward
in and effort to justify your present actions
and help relieve your mind
or in a warning so that you may
stop, halt, kill
that which may be meeting you in the later
that is now?

Have you ever just wanted to pause
Inhale...
Exhale...
you need a break from the constant winding
A chance to reflect and look at
the stillness of the movement
and
breeeaaaath...

But
the tape continues to turn
until someone takes notice
of it’s ongoing drone
and
unexpectedly
presses
stop.

Control

by

Ka Trena Underdue

What I want
I’ll never tell
What I need
I dismiss
but still request
of you
in silence
I understand
that I cannot be
understood
and yet I ask
for your answer
It’s harder to believe
when you are out of
my vision and touch
and when I can only
listen
I over. analyze. ever. little. thing.
that has no substance
in this thing
that we
have created.

A Return to

by

Ka Trena Underdue

A pearl
disregarded
gradually dislimns
and is lost
in its own darkness
scratched and abused
and tossed here and
there

(they do not know
the worth
and cannot see)

until...
someone takes notice of this
looking past the rough edges
and the malnutritioned shell
into its clear crystalline image
hidden deep, deep inside
that if allowed
would radiate throughout
and shed that which
has darkened this angels soul...

When

by

Ka Trena Underdue

always needing
what one does not want
to need
is agonizing
and to be asked what
one wants
but to not want
to say aloud
in fear of appearing
to be
how one truly is inside
is depressing
and to finally receive
what one knew
that they did not
know that they had wanted
is relieving
for when the power of
over analyzing is taken
one can finally be.
be one.

I'll always tell

by

Ka Trena Underdue

I can see in those gorgeously deep eyes
that you truly have absolutely
no idea
how definite and sincere my love is for you.

You tell me that I love you too much
How can I? when the love you give to me
is priceless?

When you squeeze me so much tighter
I know what you fear
But I promise you - I give my word to you
that I won't disappear.

I don't know how to make you realize
the way you make me feel
so I'll just tell you

I Love You
I Love You
I Love You
I Love You
I Love You

until you can understand...

Fate

by

Ka Trena Underdue

I long for the day when two will come as one
when fate will put an end to longing
I long for the day when two will share
when fate will leave them boundary-less
I long for the day when man will kiss away
old tears and replenish with new
when fate will unlock the door and allow woman to run freely into his arms
I long for the day
and fate will make a way ..... of this I'm sure of!!!

My Angel

by

Ka Trena Underdue

Alone and worry
His voice brought me peace
Scared and unexpected
His touch consoled me
On guard and shy
His eyes set me free
My wingless angel
That rescued me
You are my heart
My soul
My confidant
My friend
My love
My forget me not

Perfect Stranger

by

Ka Trena Underdue

I met the perfect stranger
Without force he stole my heart
I didn’t know his name
This thief was pretty smart
He used no trickery
No illusions or gimmicks
Just words of comfort
And gentle caresses mimicked
This master of souls
Slayed but one part
This beautiful brown eyed bandit
Forever warden of my heart
I am your prisoner
No need to escape
I am forever bound voluntarily
Forever yours to keep
For you are the key
That sets me free
Now through life and eternal-ly

Creation

by

Ka Trena Underdue

What we have created
Let no man or woman disturb
What we have created
Is nothing short of a miracle
It was not of our own doing
It was what is meant to be
Our lives have been destined
Our fate entwined
What god has blessed us with
Let no man or woman disturb
For the bond is everlasting
And the love forever true
It was destined in the stars
The day that I met YOU!!

Talk to me?

by

Ka Trena Underdue

Silence is deafening
an unbearable loud sound
why can't I hear
the words I long to hear out loud
Tell me what's happening?
Did I give you a fright?
Did I say something wrong?
Is love not home tonight?
The silence is too much
My head is in a daze
My hearts pace is like a drum
My breath is caught between
I'm waiting, I'm waiting
Can you hear me?

Game

by

Ka Trena Underdue

My heart is no game
I don't need this trip
Please stop before you hurt me...
Do you want to see me?
Do you want to hold me?
Better yet I'll hold you.
Do you want to hear my voice?
I have one ...
Call me ... now!!! Please.

IF

by

Ka Trena Underdue

If I promise not to come near you
Can I see you?
If I promise not to say who
Can I have a picture?
If I promise to only listen
Can you cell me?
If I promise hugs and kisses
Can you hold me?

You see_.
I know what you need
You show it so clearly
How could I have been blind
When you opened up and told me

I have unfinished business
That mustn’t be rattled
But I’d feel like I’m in heaven
If you’d quietly comfort me in battle.

Just one glance
Send one pic
Speak three words
Deliver one kiss

If I promise not to cry
Will you do it?
If I promise to always be with you
Will you do it?
If I promise I’m REAL
Will you?

S-P-E-L-L-E-D O-U-T

by

Ka Trena Underdue

If I was in it for money
I wouldn’t need you.
If I wanted to be unhappy
I’d stay where I’m at.
If I need someone to raise my temper
I’d put up with Al
I just want someone to grow old with

I never asked for anything
But YOU
I didn’t bother to hide my true self
And neither should you
If you can’t be there when I need you
Than step off
I just want someone to grow old with

You can’t give up on me
If you gonna hang
The wave isn’t straight
And I am the same
For the right person
I’m an addiction
I’ll lift him up and keep him high

Again, I just want someone to grow old with..

No one night stands,
No empty words
No smothering
Or "have you heard"
Give me back what I’ll give you
Peace, inspiration, strength, be true
Nurturing, unconditional love and say the words "I love you".

So if you’re real and with me
Come on by
If you’re planning a heartbreak
Keep it stepping
I may be sweet and a hopeless romantic
But I’m woman with sense
And that shit just won’t happen.

Someone to grow old with.

Surrender

by

Ka Trena Underdue

The fight was over at first sight
Wounds healing - cared for on and off
A different kind of struggle emerged
Good versus evil?
Friend or foe?
The path blocked; baracaded
Which way to go
Voices; always voices
Under watchful eyes
So tired
I believed
Distracted momentarily
Grasping for sanity
Pulling me
They won’t let go
LIES_ALL LIES
Only comfort in music and memories
Peace, partial understanding in a poem
Longing
Am I right? No I’m wrong.
No .. I don’t know
Confused
STOP
You are ALL hurting me
STOP
I am one; you are many.