The Web Poetry Corner
The Web Poetry Corner
Airdrie, AB, CA
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...the best independent ISP in the Twin Cities
and the hunger came
so I went to satisfy
this sick and worthless cause
with a thousand words
all of it came too soon
and my balance was off
and now I'm left so clear
so placid and in fear
my eyes search for a new cause
but I've consumed it all
and I blame my hunger for
and the hunger came
so it took my place, my shoreside throne
and it feels like hatred
tell me it's not real
tell me it's not the gun to your heart
and tell me you're not lying
and it feels like understanding
I've been wandering in the fog for too long
I need your light
you took my pride
and it feels like love
in the fog you shake your voice
and lure me to your position
feeling confident, I take to dive
fucking siren, I hit the rocks
Unmistakeable hate I was feeling
it brought it all back all too soon
that time when I had so clearly questioned
and I remember it all so well
just take it away to the hearing,
and I'll rest here, 'cause I need to know.
You told me too many dark nights it's not about feeling
that it's not real; to let it go
I gave up trying to watch gods fumbling
and I fell to ground zero
new angles at this destination
lets me see things I wouldn't have before
these puppet masters behind this side show
they are the reflections we know oh, so well
playing for audiences that shimmer
too hesitant to shower you with their gold
you play yourselves harder for the prizes
and break your graceful binding.
You're just as crippled as you were before
gods and titans
I saw the gods as a child
that uniformity of nothingness
and this is when I broke my eyes looking at those gods and titans.
It was awe that I was feeling
to know that someone was in charge
no fault in giving in
nothing to lose
it must have been that nothing that broke my eyes
let's take a look at the damage
feeling inside my body
taking the pieces out for inspection
ripping me out and laying me down
falling in pieces
conclusive and in pain
I know that I can be rebuilt and I cry out for those gods and titans to put a beleiver back together
and they are nowhere to be seen
must have been my broken eyes
you can imagine my frustration
I'm trying just so hard right now to understand
so give me a moment.
This is about territory but you forgot where your bounderies lay. This is about what you are but identity forms a crisis for you. This is about what you were always taught was real but you've dismissed all your teachers.
And you're left with me.
To comprimise; to understand; to realize; to figure it out
You classify me as nothing.
I am nothing.
And now I have to punish the stupid.
'cause it's this nothingness; this empty spirit
that's gonna drag you, pull you, tear you down.
But you're afraid of it, and you're tears are falling
you're afraid of it, this emptiness
Why are you afraid of nothing?
It's this nothingness you tried to forget that's gonna rip you outta your cocumb filled with all your treasures.
Feeling so empty inside I'm thinking your fear might fill me up and make me your guide into those heavenly places inside your insecurity.
Realize that I don't care if you survive it's all going to go anyway. This should make me feel bad inside, but I'm nothing to you.
And I'm free from the charges.
I don't need my conscience.
Nothing is oblivious to this bullshit,
so I'm coming after you.
it's the awkwardness that gives me this sense of disability
with the weights of your love making me staggar
tearing to the left and pushing me around
pumping and sucking and pushing and pulling
it's my off-centered heart that's killing me.
And so I concentrate.
We'll begin to push it to the center
I want this unnaturally flavored
and I'm feeling pressures warding hostile objectives
and the gears groan to life
so intricate these perfectly manufactured bits
they tear and groan, push and pull, and we begin the transformation.
Forcing through the tissues
creating what I should have always wanted
ripping open my flesh and bone
pushing my heart towards perfect alignment
And we begin to know
It was my off centered heart that made me human.
Brother jesus why can't you accept virtue?
and welcome me to the family.
Mother Mary let me drink your milk.
I'm your son like no other.
Spend the days whispering words
staring at my centered world
Whatever happened to inner-peace?
giving off hostility for tranquility
all I want is reflection, but
it's all you can do to keep away from me
and now we know that it was my off-centered heart that will make me want to love.
it's all I could again
to just give up
this part is the best
with your face on my heart
it's all I could, to keep it away
it's how you're in my eyes
but it's so nice
because I can't see anything else
when I fell off that cliff
but it feels so nice
it was how you were on my thoughts
in my eyes, covering my heart
as my life crashed into the ground
it was you
might I be with you?
for an eternity?
with you on my thoughts
smothering my heart
blinding my eyes
might I be with you
could I take what you give?
could I smile from the pleasure?
could I with this paralyzed body?
from when it hit the ground
with you in it's eyes
swimming in it's thoughts
and breaking it's heart
it can't feel you
but you'll always be hovering in its thoughts
and curing it's eyes
and healing it's heart
and you'll always be with me.
failing to comply
don't know how to catch up
following your aroma
this path of destruction you're laying down
wasn't life about creation? What ever became of dignity?
trying to catch up to you
so far ahead
don't know if I'll make it,
but I'll work it out, pump it out, strain it out,
failing seems to give me strength
don't know how far I'll make it
but I won't stop till I die.
rhythmic beats pushing me foreward
kind of like the blood from my heart
who thought redundancy has it's virtues?
and the implications are clear
you'll fall away
and I'll chase after you
till I die
romantic idiocies blinding my senses
as this unforgiving prize keeps me guessing.
this is all but love for me
trying to find you
don't know of second thoughts
just the indignities that fall between
prizes of mist are still rewarding
I'll follow till that beat runs out
till I die
consequences are by now irrelevant
irrelevancies seem to be dangerous
questioning morals never seemed so disturbing
ignoring the signs
by now death is becoming
trying to understand
is like true climaxing
beats after beats after beats after beats after beats
being cut off has opened me wider
did you think you could fill that void?
this six month slumber has left my world to you
and you read all I wrote
I've never felt so used
something like a choice between serenity
and all I ever wanted.
my severed thumbs are awakening me
and I'm putting the forms to question
you approach me with a fearing
it's how you read all I wrote
all I wrote
why did I write those words in the first place?
was it really helping?
but I'm still betrayed and you looked inside of me
this couldn't be what love is
and you looked in me
you touched in me
you betrayed me
you're feeling me
you're hurting me
you choking me
you're killing me
you've killed me
why was it in you
this power of question?
making attempts to reasemble a shadow game
was it all you ever wanted?
hoping for disclosure from this ackward situation
you've looked in me and this shame isn't necessary
from what should have been.
"I will let it fester.
I don't mind it.
Fearing full-fledged this
type of anger I can hear
you tell me I can handle it
and show me your kingdom near."
what will they all think?
something cruel or unpleasent
but it shouldn't matter to you
you're above this
wishing for a change
something a bit more desireable
maybe something we can all agree upon
with our heads in the sand
thoughts runing from the whispering
knowing what we should've said that day
but when it all breaks through,
will your faith hold true?
disgusting and brought to shame
how did life ever become this way?
showing weakness, the vultures circle for miles
you're just hoping that someone hears what you pray
but will your faith ring true?
will it guide and protect you?
don't sing praise until you trust those hymns
living life by those creeds
you've never learned the words
but you'll recite them to the very last day
'...and blessed is the fruit of thy womb... who was concieved by... who art in heaven, hallowed be thy... INRI, INRI, INRI... help us, oh lord... why do we suffer, oh lord.... can you hear us, oh lord..."
now bringing everything to question
hoping still that it'll be allright
hoping it will be the same
will it be the same
when your faith falls through?
wiltered like a fallen rose
wishing for a new faith
crying from being alone
and opening your legs again
broken like chosen hero
failing to comprehend
capable of feeling wrong
whispered away again
I'm trying so hard, love
I'm trying so hard
give the wounds some time to heal
then pull them open again
anger is like that winged dragon
coming to find you
burning down that forest of confusion
wrapped around your minds smoke
but this shouldn't hurt love
this should create again.
Altered like your gods of life
bartering for your soul
whichever way you're condemed for good
follow me and it'll be over soon
don't go that way, love
I've tried so hard.
I've tried so hard.
these red skies bleed memories
angels fall through those contradictions
and your god feigns at this truth
built by bloodied hands
held up with sore backs
it's a task to make the rooftops
perhaps it's how we see those people
of so long ago
maybe it's how we will never know them
as we lay on our backs
and as I sit in my chair
and as I think of you
wind brings smells of hate and love
I can't see the difference anymore
stirring my senses, my brain, myself
these damned red skies are evermore
can you think of me as I think of you?
do you know I am awake?
is this all too familiar to you?
like when you knelt down to pray?
but rest your head, child
it's been a long, hard day
the stillness inside means nothing to you
and still you attempt to dream it away
but still we rest under the rooftops
and watch for falling angels
your god steps back once more
he cannot contend with such angles
this is a new beggining
they're dancing like they're on fire
twirling, casting, dreaming to a dead world we knew before
now they're hunting;
in those fields of long ago;
those feelings you chose to ignore
teething a hunger I supposed to implore
trying to be forgetting those warriors of long ago
why do those indians look so sad?
why does my indian look so sad?
tracking those feelings
the ones I did ignore
trying to remember what I did before
I know they're lost now
I'm afraid and lonely to such a degree
I'm begging, praying to those indians for their aid
but they won't stop dancing
like they're on fire
they're ingnoring, not hearing all I'm trying to say
and I know now I'm that land of long ago
the one which they choose to ignore
buildings open me from a withered life
trying not to care but I'm always suckered into giving
those genocides making me weep(again)
I don't know when it'll end
tired of feeling nothing
anything will do
so I reach for the cure
something my fathers voted against
but I need this so I know I'm real
minding the majorities
my mind's still wandering
there must be something under my skin
I need this
cutting away all I used to be
ripping apart my chest
inspecting my heart so I know it's working
splitting open my head
is the brain still there?
reaching down my throat until I know what I've become
what's this new treasure inside those secrecies?
one time's enough
feeling foolish for finding my heart
I knew it was there all along
why did I need to check?
feeling so stupid
kicking it away
I've forgotten already
ran the circle again
I guess this is human nature
you're clutching that cross
like it's your last
blood's always flowing from your god
why is that love for you?
something almost passionate
it's so grotesque
but it's always decided that you're sure you're right
how could there be any other way?
it kinda makes me feel like we're being bred
it kinda makes me feel like this has been said
it kinda makes this shithole look like home
it kinda helps me feel so alone
but you're in control
just standing there
stupid and succulent
I'm trying not to feel pity
but you look so tender
standing there, growing fatter, happily seduced
sure you're free
and those angels are ever present, just like a dream
beckining those nightmares
with that cross in you hand
those nails digging into you
something of a simile comes to me
confusing all those metaphors
they all tend to get in the way
of what you're sure you want
hosting those indians
but they tend to wander
and you'll stay behind
not quite sure
but you know you're right either way
that consuming mantra
I need to take it all in
to take it all in
you gave off your voice
those sweet and tender memories
and I took it all in
to tell me I like it
I tell you I like it
and I couldn't take it in any more
my binge was so supressed
and so now I need the purging
to purge it all out
I needed to purge it all out
so I can take in more
so I can binge again
to take it all in
and I can't see the end of the table
and you tell me it ends with the binge
those sweet and tender memories
and so I try to take it all in
I want to see it end
so I don't have to take it all in
and I began to understand why
this erectium shows me the way
pillars not withstanding the void of your love
acid eating away those dreams
pot holes are just slowing me down
and those dunes of angel's breath might choke this useless wanderer.
but I'm allright.
I'm used to being allright
Those demons used to frighten that boy
and the man stood from within
and stuck in that path
but I feel this anger rising up
and I'll stand sideways
can't work with this winged clockwork
stand with me
pillars can't hold us down
we'll face the fire in a fus-ed embrace
love, we'll die to live.
Not just a rythm anymore, is it
forming a callous
dead skin just drying away
it doesn't seem like there's gonna be an end to this shit
you're killing me off, but all I'm getting is peace
it doesn't hurt anymore
with your hand on that blade
I'm still bleeding, but I've bled before
it doesn't hurt anymore
silent prayers should redeem it all
and your broken knees are significant
from all your sinning
I became your demon
with all those fears from being invincible,
impermeable; I can't feel a thing
and I'm coming after you
when the fears come for you, are you wishful?
and within, do those prayers comfort you?
you won't feel anything after our final act
some kind of shakespearean tragedy
why won't you welcome invincibility?