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The Web Poetry Corner - James Bredin - Toronto Garbage
Met a garbage bylaw inspection guy today,
Think of them as powerful people here to stay,
He checked for sure to see that cardboard was flattened,
And containers with glass were properly battened.
And garbage had to be there by seven o’clock,
And only six items allowed or they’ll walk,
And it has to be put out during the night,
No pesticides or cans of oil that might ignite.
No paint cans, propane tanks, batteries and such,
If it’s the least bit messy they won’t even touch,
No sawdust allowed or any renovation stuff,
No sods or soil even if you want to cleanup.
No nails in the wood you might want to put out,
And no more than twenty kilos or there about,
No shopping bags or even a cardboard box,
Certainly no redecoration stuff or rocks,
And grass clippings are not allowed or accepted,
Tied down garbage cans are not to be expected,
Branches will be tied up to less than three feet,
In neat little bundles by the side of the street.
And don’t you dare pour any stuff down the drain,
They’ll track you down so you have nothing to gain,
Dumping garbage on streets is against the law,
So they’ve got you in their garbage bylaw claw.
Ten dollar fee for picking up an appliance,
That is if they like you and you’re in compliance,
Your grey box and blue box should be filled,
With the proper stuff so they’ll feel fulfilled.
Now don’t you feel better about this information?
Does it add in the least to your frustration?
‘Cause then they send it all to Michigan State,
Two hundred trucks a day without much debate.
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