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Teen Movie Critic - II

The Fifth Element



The Fifth Element
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The Fifth Element is a movie for people who like special effects cheesier than concession stand nachos. The aliens look like plastic action figures; the vehicles look like matchbox cars; the weapons look like water pistols. And this is supposed to be the year 2259 A.D.? Even in the "unenlightened nineties", the movie industry can do better than that.

The plot, although vague, certainly isn't going to win any awards for originality. The beginning is a too-long scene involving the action figure aliens, who have come to earth to warn a few scientists of the evil coming in three hundred years. Sound familiar?

Three hundred years later, Bruce Willis is a pathetic taxi-driver (his taxi floats!). For no apparent reason, (he is good-looking, if you like the rugged, muscular type) he has terrible luck with women. Then he runs into a woman who is apparently some sort of goddess-on-earth come to save the world from evil. Boom! Major romance. It's obvious where this movie's going from that point on. The rest of the movie is pointlessly violent; the cheesy special effects continue, and it becomes unbearably long...

If you like futuristic movies about good guys and bad guys kicking each other's you-know-whats, you should see it. I just prefer movies with less "Bang! You're dead!"

My Rating = One Star

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