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Teen Movie Critic - III

Jurassic Park 3


Mandy Heiser

Jurassic Park 3
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After The Lost World you'd think Speilburg would have given up on Jurassic Park movies.... we hoped, but it was no use. He decides to make another one to rake in the cash, now this movie WILL make money, that's a give-in. It's a sad thing that people will see this at all. Even though they know full well that it's going to stink.

It's another Jurrassic Park! We have to see it!

Let's start with the plot which is TERRIBLY silly and corny. Raptors can talk to each other in their own special language, and the kid who goes missing is the hero! They made the kid out to be smarter than the scientist! Now the reason for the child is to get kids to see it, cuz as we all know little children like seeing kids their age being the heros (Think The Goonies) Bluntly put, it was all REALLY corny.

Now my next complaint, is the lack of...well everything. The movie was about an hour and a half, and almost NOTHING happened. They fell for the old "Steal the eggs of the vicious animal" trick which we all know means they're in for it. Nothing is solved in this movie, everything is more predictable than I thought imaginable, and the ending is the silliest I've ever seen. A bunch of tanks and helicopters come up to the Island, ready for the dinosaurs (that don't even come out by the way). I would say it's anti-climatic but it's just really stupid. On top of all this, if there were any jokes, they weren't funny, the action was the same-old dino action we'd expect (which unfortunately means that it just isn't scary anymore). When I saw the first film in the theater, I remember being actually scared, but this was just so lame, the action was just boring and it seemed like they weren't even TRYING to make this film enjoyable.

So basically, don't see this movie, don't give Speilburg your hard-earned money, he doesn't deserve it. I TRIED to think of at least one reason to give this film 2 stars...I couldn't come up with one. Not even the special effects were worth that much. This movie isn't funny, it isn't scary...so what is it? It's boring and on top of that it's just a bad film.

My Rating = One Star

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