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How Can You Laugh at a Time Like This?

Bruce Madison

No. 144

Mooning the ogre

December 8, 1997

The title for this column was stolen from a article written by Bob Metcalfe for Infoworld. He won't mind, since he also lifted the phrase from elsewhere. The ogre to which it refers is public opinion. The mooner...he who drops trou and sticks his shiny white buttocks in the face of said "ogre"...is Bill Gates. Mr. Metcalfe is referring to the recent restraint of trade case being brought by the Attorney General of Justice Department of these United States against Microsoft and Mr. Gates, specifically to Microsoft's response to the charges. He ridicules Microsoft's claim that Internet Explorer is an "integral part" of the operating system, since it isn't necessary to Windows and isn't even very well integrated, except for a clumsy attempt to "extend" the browser metaphor to the operating system (it is slow and clunky). Although MS promises that it will be better integrated into Windows97...I mean Windows98 (or Windows99 or whatever), it is clearly NOT an integral part of the operating system at present.

Metcalfe, good fellow that he is, goes on to say that he personally does not like the government sticking its nose into "our" (meaning the computer community's) business, but takes Gates to task anyway, for arrogance toward all us computer geniuses that surely know what he is up to.

Well, I'm with Bob in feeling that the government should butt out, but I'm not so sure about his claims that "we" know what Bill is up to. Ever since I first took a look at the innards of Microsoft's first Basic interpreter...and was MIGHTY impressed...I have had rather unbounded admiration for Gates. His subsequent behavior, bearding mighty IBM in its den by buying MS-DOS from some hackers and reselling it at enormous profit to IBM shortly thereafter, did nothing to diminish my esteem for the man. Indeed, as the years went on and Gates, et al, successfully took on and vanquished opponent after opponent in the VERY competitive arena of software sales, my regard for his management talents just grew and grew. Using every trick in the book and some of his own invention he successfully navigated each and every rapid change in the computer business. MS took hits here and there, but always recovered with breathtaking speed. When the Internet arrived on the scene, surprising everyone but Buckminster Fuller devotees, I thought that Gates had finally met his Donnybrook. His initial response seemed to me feeble and defensive. Like a mighty battleship, MS did not seem to be nimble enough to make the quick turns necessary to catch and eliminate that little frigate, Netscape, as it added yet another tune to the hit parade of computer software sales strategies. And what a hit it was! Give your stuff away...FREE...to all comers. Grab the market from MS before it even knows what is happening. Make your money...somehow...later. Of course, mighty MS had plenty of resources to bring to this game. Internet Explorer came out of the gate much more quickly than anyone thought possible and, by version 4.0, currently in the hopper, it had successfully drawn even with Navigator/Communicator, at least in technical excellence. But, the Internet brought other innovations. Now, MS was also faced with the specter of little Sun, with its long languishing JAVA programming language. This language, devised to service "smart" appliances, turned out to be a neat fit to the emerging Internet...and, a potential threat to MS's operating system dominance. "Write once, run anywhere," SunSoft's motto...also implies that the operating system underneath the JAVA engine is irrelevant, something MS did NOT want to hear.

So Metcalfe says that Microsoft and thus, Bill Gates, must grow up. It must realize that it is no longer a teenie-weenie fighting the rapacious giant, but instead IS itself the rapacious giant. Thus, it must behave...responsibly...like the corporate behemoth that it has become. It can't get away with giving away its browser like Netscape did, especially with the spurious claim of integratedness MS is making, because circumstances have changed. In short, Mr. Metcalfe is really agreeing with the government that MS is restraining trade...unfairly using its operating system "monopoly" to grind poor little Netscape (and Sun, but that is another story) into the dust.

What does all this have to do with "public opinion." Well, I suspect Mr. Metcalfe, like a large number of computer industry pundits, confuses us computer dweebs with the general public, forgetting that not everyone is up on the esoterica of operating systems. Besides, the word "integration" is usually used in a completely different context in public media.

But, wait a minute here! Has everyone forgotten how MS got to where it is? Have we forgotten that MS-DOS was not a new operating system, but a watered down clone of UNIX. That Windows was invented at Xerox, thence to Apple and finally, when MS got the message, to Windows?

Hey, guys! I got news for you. UNIX is still alive and well. Windows NT, MS's pride and joy, is a TERRIBLE server "solution." Compared to almost any flavor of UNIX, it is a real clunker. It doesn't scale...that is, its current version does not handle multiple processors well. It lacks fail over capability...that is, the ability to quickly switch processes to a backup server when the primary server fails. It craps out trying to feed fast networks, topping out at 300 megabits per second, making it unusable for gigabit networks, the latest and greatest local network hardware. In short, except for desktop systems (I use it myself for that purpose, even feeding my four computer 10 megabit network...and it's great), its a total loser. Check out all the ISP's that went for MS hype concerning Windows NT. They are foundering while those going for the traditional...and proven...UNIX systems, are making hay while the sun shines. Every time the NT suckers have to make "performance enhancements," they wade ever deeper into the MS shit storm of bugs and problems. Remember, one of the "innovations" that worked so well for MS has been "vaporware"...i.e. promise them anything, give them what they get.

Remember, Windows NT is built on MS-DOS, which is built upon crippled UNIX, while UNIX is built upon...well, UNIX...with all the bells and whistles singing loud and clear. Of course, UNIX has problems. It always has had them. It was designed by committee...always a hard road...and has been relatively open to hacker's changes since day one, resulting in many non-standard additions. Still, this same openness and the relatively long time the many hackers have had to straighten out problems has resulted in a very mature and stable system.

Finally, remember that MS does not simply operate in a national environment, but in the rapidly emerging global market. Netscape is just a fly on the wall compared to what is going to come out of Asia in the twenty first century. If I were a young Indian or Malaysian or Chinese programmer today, I would be taking a good, long, hard look at UNIX, particularly Linux, the latest completely open and...sign of the times?...FREE UNIX operating system. Wouldn't it be possible to streamline this aging wonder, add in a good JAVA engine and a streamlined windows-like GUI, internationalize it and maybe, just maybe, sell it to IBM or perhaps Mitsubishi? Hey, it worked before!

So, mark my words. This latest hoorah is a tempest in a teapot. Gates is, once again, looking over his shoulder at the grim reaper of free market and, I think, making some smart moves. His only mistake is underestimating the short sightedness of American chauvinism, as practiced by those CEBBTOs of CEBBTOs, U.S. government agencies. My advice, Bill, for what it is worth, is give onto Caeser..etc.. Back off, placate public opinion with a few mea culpas and keep your eye on the ball, which is, in this case, the entire earth. But, you probably already knew that.

Talk to you later...


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