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Excuse us? In a thorough reading the U.S. constitution, one discovers that the only qualifications for being president are that you must have been born in the U.S. and be over thirty five years of age. Last time we looked, Oprah did indeed have these qualifications.

So, we conclude that this is definitely not the reasons that some believe that she is not qualified. So, let's look at some other possibilities.

Perhaps it's because she does not belong to the old boys network. She may not know how to "go along to get along," as do so many of our current political crop. She has never traded pork barrel projects with her associates in order to "earn" their support for her own unnecessary schemes or to get elected or re-elected.

Maybe it's because she has never dodged the draft or awarded herself bogus medals in order to escape combat once she was in it. She has also never falsified intelligence reports in order to lead tens of thousands of men and women into harms way and get many thousands of these killed or wounded to advance her own fortunes. She is obviously not "tough enough" for the job.

She has also never swung government contracts to her friends in return for millions of dollars in "salary" from her friends. Indeed, she made her own money by vision and hard work rather than simply inheriting it or marrying into it. What kind of qualifications are those for an American president?

Heck she has never even swung an election in her favor by appealing to the Supreme Court or by covering up election irregularities where votes are being openly stolen. In fact, she has never held public office at all, so she didn't even get a chance to do these ever-so-common political moves.

And the list goes on. She doesn't know how to tell a lie in such a way as to achieve deniability if challenged. She has never appointed her cronies to positions for which they are clearly unqualified. She probably wouldn't even use her power and prestige to get young men to give her some head in the Oval Office. She believes that women have a right to choose their own destinies when it comes to child bearing. She pushes private educational initiatives, spending her own money when she does rather than taxpayer dollars. She lauds reading and self reliance. She even believes in world peace, of all the crazy things!

No, Oprah simply does not fit the mold of the successful American politician in the twenty first century. She has never stolen from the poor to support the rich. She has never voted for the Patriot Act, or, for that matter, for any bill that would restrict the civil rights of her fellow citizens. She thinks that negotiations are better than violence. She wants to lock up pedophiles and, again, puts her own money on the line to do so. She inspires confidence, love and trust rather than fear, insecurity and hatred of those who are different.

Looked at these ways, it is clear that Oprah just doesn't cut the mustard when it comes to living up to good old American political morality. Instead, she was a poor girl born in Mississippi, was raised by her grandmother on a farm and built a media empire from scratch said to be worth today over a billion dollars, none of which fit the profile of a successful politician in this day and age. She sits at head of this enterprise, and runs it from day to day with skill and dedication. Hardly what the American people want from a presidential candidate!

So, maybe the skeptics are right. Perhaps she ISN'T qualified at all. Gosh, we're sorry we even brought it up.

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